Ease into Clarity with Dr. Divi
EPISODE 6: Why we are afraid of the feminine?

This podcast episode is about why we are afraid of the feminine? Why as a society are we so afraid of embracing our feminine?What are the stories we carry around with us that make us think that embracing that female side can be scary? Let’s take a look.

Hi, I'm Dr. Divi, host of the podcast "Ease into Clarity." I'm a family doctor turned yoga teacher turned intuitive coach. I've been coaching and using intuition for over 13 years. I help people with daily life problems using intuition and emotions in the mind. In this podcast, you will hear from me weekly, where I will share life tools, life skills, life techniques, and intuition to help you with your daily challenges. Everyone's got it.

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Speaker 1 0:01
Welcome back to the Podcast. I'm Dr. Divi. And thank you for joining me. This podcast's ease into clarity is just for you. If you've got an email question you want to ask, feel free to email me at [email protected]. As you know, I talked about things that inspire me, I answer email questions, and I use intuition, universal law, and energy to help you. So today's podcast is going to be a takeoff from the last podcast, where I talked about the feminine thing I think is I feel is missing on the planet that's still there. But we just need to apply to that. So in today's podcast, we're going to talk about why we're afraid at the feminine, because honestly, we are honestly, just y'all know, it's kind of a fun topic for me, because my coach who I've known for 13 years, has been talking to me about the feminine for 13 years. And what I realized in retrospect, was that I have been afraid of it. Like I said, in the last podcast, I was raised to be a guy, I was young when I went to medical school - I was 19 years old. So I was making a lot of money when I was 25 years old. And what's super interesting, is that that way of thinking that I gotta work I got to do I've got a struggle I've got to make it is deeply implanted in the cells of my being. It's what I think about, you know, my phone's there, I gotta check the email up got to do this up, got to look at social media. The idea of taking a breath and breaks from it has been a struggle for me. Why? Like I said in the last episode, men are equally as affected because men sometimes don't want to run out and make a million dollars. Men want to be validated for who they are not for what they accomplish. Men might want to explore the sensitive and creative sides, and don't feel like they can because they've got to provide. So in today's episode, we're going to talk about why is being feminine, scary.

Why is it so I'm going to reflect a bit of my old childhood and hopefully this will trickle up thoughts for yourself. I grew up in an East Indian family, immigrant parents, wonderful parents, my mother is beautiful. And growing up my entire childhood. She wore saris a lot of the time, you've probably seen them the beautiful, one piece kind of outfit that women wear from the Indian continent. They're gorgeous. And they cover our bodies up quite well. My mother has a beautiful figure, but she masks and covers up the saris. And then when she wasn't wearing saris, she wore pants and shirts, I used to call them North American clothes, she never wore dresses, never showed her legs. Always wear long pants and long shirt that were baggy - not fitted. And so and so when you're growing up seeing this as your first maternal influence, and then take into other things you were taught. There's no surprise, I think being a female is scary. So another thing I was taught a lot, I'm curious if you were I was taught being a woman equals being a target of sorts. I was taught if I if I exposed my body that that would be blasphemous, I was taught if I wear makeup, something awful is gonna happen. I was taught not to be feminine, not expose my body because I would draw attention to myself that was evil. These are words that I was actually taught. So you can imagine that somewhere deep in my subconscious. I have this idea that women are weak. Women are going to be preyed upon if I wear makeup, heaven forbid I wear lipstick. If I do my hair in a pretty way I would be looked at and somebody will want something from me. And I have no choice but to give it to them because they're bigger than me. That's what I was taught. So no wonder it's scary to be a girl. Oh my God, because this is the thinking that I was taught.

The other thinking a lot of my clients were taught is, you know, if you're a woman and spread your legs, you're a slut. And the only ones they marry are the good girls. And I know you're probably thinking, well, that's old thinking, well, that still exists today. I have an 18 year old son, I've watched him grow up, I hear the talk in the in the locker rooms in amongst the girls of his friend group, they still think the same way. So no wonder we're afraid of the feminine, because it's been pushed away. How many of us as women were told, we we are on the rag when we are on our period. We are too much or she's being emotional. She's on a period. In my own experience, the degree of my emotional baggage two or three days before my period was 100% related to whether or not I was suppressing my emotions or accepting my emotions all month. If I was like, Alright, I feel the anger. I don't feel the sadness. I don't feel that resentment. Then two or three days before my period. It all came out. If I was feeling my emotions, expressing myself being myself during the month, that the time I cycle I had no Problem, two or three days before Even during the flow it wasn't bad, it was normal. It's no big deal.

But you can see that these little subtle things that were taught, are constantly back in the back of the mind saying, there's something wrong with you, you're weak, you're an alien. So how do we work through this? One way to work through and we're gonna go through other examples in a minute. What am I am teaching is to recognize it's not true. Half the planet are women, half of us, there's billions of beautiful women out there. None of us are weak. We are born with a soul and a spirit that is here to shine on the planet. How could I be weak, that was just thinking I was taught that's from an intergenerational pattern. And if like myself, you come from a country, you might be you're an immigrant, like I was, you know, that thinking is deep, deep, deep in our unconscious. So of course, it's going to show up in my childhood, and of course, it's going to show up in my mind. So I deal with that, I decide I don't want that anymore. I decide I'm going to forgive that way of thinking, I'm going to decide I choose differently.

Another reason that we're looked at, we are looked down on in the energy of being feminine, is because we we somehow construe that it's like we are doing nothing if you're feminine. I don't know about you. But I've delivered many babies, when I went through medical school, I've delivered my own son. There is nothing not feminine about pregnancy and delivery, breastfeeding, mothering, we think we are doing nothing. When you plant your roses this year, and maybe you'll do it from the seed or you plant your cucumbers or tomatoes, you will usually start with a seed or a tiny little plant. In my opinion, I have to give it water and have to give it love, maybe some sunlight. And the next thing I know these tomatoes and cucumbers are going to sprout from my garden. And those tomatoes and cucumbers are going to feed me, I could perceive that that seed is doing nothing. Or I could perceive that in that seed is the makeup to do something pretty magnificent. So sitting back and doing nothing is actually not true.

We need both the feminine, and the masculine to survive. But again, a lot of us are taught to do to do to be feminine is scary, to be doing nothing is wrong, because that's the way the masculine mind works. And that's okay, what do we do with that? Forgive it an honor. But we as women bring our grace, our sensitivity, all of those things are childbearing so much. We're also taught that as women, we're less than, you're less than, because you know, you're not as strong. You're not as fit. And as a result of that, you're less than, hmm, is that something I want to believe? No. And if I believe it, I will see it in my life. By the universe law reflection, if I believe I am less than, then universal law is gonna work out and the universe is going to bring me people who think I'm less than, I don't believe that anymore. I'm done with that one. Let's throw that out. Because being less than could be not true. I'm a child of spirit. I have a soul in me that can manifest Law of Attraction works on me and my husband. Wow. Right. So the soul in me is not less than.

So giving up a thought that I'm less than is super important. Because if I want to believe the feminine, the masculine is equal, if I want to believe the feminine is weak, I've got an unshakable, all these little thoughts. I'll give you one more that a lot of women, you know, people believe as to why they're afraid of the feminine. I alluded to it earlier. We are taught that we are too emotional. And as a result of being too, too emotional, were weak. I don't know if you've ever studied businesses nowadays, and, you know, fortune 500 magazines. But there's a lot of studies out there to show that companies hire based on emotional intelligence, not just book intelligence. In fact, many companies because of AI, well, actually higher emotional intelligence.

Speaker 1 9:18
Well over book intelligence, book intelligence can be taught to anybody. Emotional Intelligence is life intelligence, emotional intelligence, and spiritual intelligence. Emotional Intelligence is your soul and spirit showing up in the world saying, I'm not afraid to be sad. I'm not afraid to be angry. I'm not afraid to worry. Because I can, I can move to another emotion and dance with it. And that's not who I am. So if you perceive being weak, as feminine, because you're emotional, throw in the garbage, being emotional and make a million bucks these days. So again, there's lots of other ones. But these are just really simple ones. I want to share that we have To want, we will have to embark on a layer, why we're afraid to step into the feminine role and I'm sure a lot more popping into your head. If you want to share it with me, feel free to email me at [email protected]. But as each of us start to realize that we have the power within us to make babies, we have the power within us to be a seed and spread a plant. We have the power within us to be free, then we can decrease our fear of our femininity. We can decrease the fear of being female. We can embrace it, we can wear those skirts for us. We can wear the makeup for us. We can do our hair and heels for us. Not for them, not out of fear. Hope that helps. sending you lots of love. See you next time.